4:30 PM

Took time off from work today, after having a real bad diarrohoea in the wee hours and just taking time trying to clear the stuff on my laptop since it's been having a low disk space since God-knows-how-long-it- was..

And yet, even though all this time, i felt a nagging thought at the back of my head: come back to Me.

I guess, even with all these while, I've been running away from God with all the things that I don't want to face. It's been there, for so long, like a skeleton in the closet.

Maybe you must be wondering why is this even an issue? Like, surely everyone must have a deep dark secret that only they themselves find comfort in.

Yet, Isa 53:3- 5 says:

He was despised and rejected by men,
a man of suffering who knew what sickness was.
He was like one people turned away from;
He was despised, and we didn't value Him.
Yet He Himself bore our sicknesses,
and He carried our pains;
but we in turn regarded Him stricken,
struck down by God, and afflicted.
But He was pierced because of our transgressions,
crushed because of our iniquities;
punishment for our peace was on Him,
and we are healed by His wounds.

The danger of not wanting to receive this healing could be due to pride, guilt emotions, self pity and so on and so forth.. which i do admit that there are indeed all of those in me (yes, i'm still human on the other end of the computer). Which then the question lies ahead of me, which do i desire more? being comfortable in my own comfort zone or being glued to God (like what ps victor shared yesterday)? being stuck in the rut or do i want to soar on eagles' wings?

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