this week's really busy!!! haha. no more 'actng busy'...

been researching on human nutrition and also upon veganism (dun worry, im not turning into one yet...) cos my boss wanna do a sustainable garden so that he'll nv have to buy vegetables from the market again. haha.

so ya... and im sick again... argh. amid the swine flu, im down with flu... sheesh. so doctor gave me 2 days' mc... and thus i have a long weekend again. sigh. cos i can't get out of the house cos of the scare abt swine flu.

so i can't go get my gardening supplies. =/


acting 'busy' again...

anyway... last week was a super emo week... like God wanna break me but i was just simply not ready. (like i am right now.. haha)

yup. im better now... not so emo le.. =)

anyway... im learning piano from jennifer and guitar from jocelyn. =) really a dream coming true sia... cos i really always wanted to learn piano since young so ya. yay! and my guitar has been laying to waste for years at home and ya..time to learn and use it.

im so glad it's a short week this week cos of labour day and i really cannot wait for my lessons to start. whee.

and God noes i love to talk. =p and i really cannot live without talking much and so i thank God for ppl in my life whom i can talk to if not i will really die. *makes me wonder how on earth i survived in my primary sch days sia, being an anti social kid

and daryl gave me a bottle of sweets from aussie! it's good stuff, i noe, but i dun eat sweets lei (cos it's too addictive for me). so ya... sigh. shall bless the ppl who are dozing off during sermons and maybe whoever wants la..


dear people,

it's been a long time since i've last updated. and sometimes it's really hard, really really hard to say/ type the things that's within me.

like okays, God's hand is at work to break and mold the parts that has ben bound by inner vows and hurts. and right now, im feeling really quite crappy.

like im in that place that i can't share everything to everyone not because im afraid to be exposed, but because it will be a stumbling block to the ppl around me. i dun know if u understand, but i feel really very terrible.

like everyday, i feel like im on the verge of crying, i wanna cry out, but i can't.

haha, now playing on my media player's we are not as strong as we think we are.

how true. we always think we are very strong, and think we can be very strong, but really, that's really all a facade.

we put on strong and brave fronts, but yet when everything falls, and then we realise that we are really weak. we think thru all these we can be made even stronger, but no! God says when u cannot do it, depend on Me and Me alone. then there's no choice but to crawl out of the broken facade. it's painful, but as u depend on God for His strength, u'll think why am i so dumb to have not leaned upon God so long ago?

haha, it's a paradox. sheesh. and im at that place. crap.

forget it. i wanted to add in more things, but i guess, no one is able to get it. argh!


just felt for a quick update...

the week has been quite a crappy one.. esp like im struggling with some internal issues with myself... and yup. i've been losing my temper this week, and everything is all internal, but can quite obviously see that im not exactly gillian this week even tho for the past some time im not really myself either... rawr.

and i really hate the garden.


alright... back again... cos fang has been wondering y i haven't been updating...

hmmm... i also dunno wad to type actually... other than im gonna miss mabel and henry when they are not ard in office...

ya...

thus saith the Lord.

okay... that above line was random. argh...

oh... been buying loads of stuff!!! omgoodness.... im broke soon. someone, pls stop me from spending!!!