im on an emotion roller coaster.


im still so PISSED that my sis spoilt my TEVA SLIPPERS! damn. and she still complained that the slippers make her itch. who ask her to wear them huh? dirty then never wash and spoil them. wear like it belongs to her like that. haha. the slippers are big for for her feet. hope she trips and fall with them. and i'll be the first to laugh.


in case if u didn't noe, im mean. and if u dun like it, too bad. cos that's the real me. im mean to those hu are against me.


if u want to noe y im like that, it's cos im like that and u have to thank my childhood for that.


but then again, is that even counted as a childhood?? a childhood even deserved of any child?


i noe it's the second post within 2 hrs..but i reallie have to sae this..


i never knew some things about daryl's new guitar...till now.

1) it's a customed- made guitar.

2) it cost USD 3700...(that's like SGD 7400?![plus plus..])

3)(i knew this on sun.) the base is made up of 5 diff. types of wood.


okies.i guess he should get a guitar that reallie brings out the best of his skills rite? but somehow i can't tell that it's a superb guitar..lol. cos i can't reallie play mar... =p


erm..if u (daryl) are reading this hors....erm..dun take this post too seriously..that's all i can sae.


i noe it's the second post within 2 hrs..but i reallie have to sae this..


i never knew some things about daryl's guitar...till now.

1) it's a customed- made guitar.

2) it cost USD 3700...(that's like SGD 7400?![plus plus..])

3)(i knew this on sun.) the base is made up of 5 diff. types of wood.


okies.i guess he should get a guitar that reallie brings out the best of his skills rite? but somehow i can't tell that it's a superb guitar..lol. cos i can't reallie play mar... =p


erm..if u (daryl) are reading this hors....erm..dun take this post too seriously..that's all i can sae.


fever on and off like super weird...


woke up at nearly 2am cos having slight fever and took my medication...just to puke it all out within seconds...and cat's been with mi all the while...


was still feeling nauseous...and my cat came over to sit/ lie beside mi...(how sweet of her right?) and i couldn't help to irritate her again...


and it hit mi. my cat has the same character as mi. like they always sae...'like father, like son' or 'like mother, like daughter'...so i guess it's true when they sae 'like owner, like pet'.


i guess i love to be loved..but at the same time i dun wan too much attention. hmm.


actually, i dun reallie noe myself.and there's sth i have to sae.i feel im losing it. which i dun wan.sighs.


yep.im back.


no more high fever!!!(after 2 daes of persistant high fever!) whee. tho im feeling ultra hot even tho i've bathed.


well..guess i have to 'sweat it out' huh?


4 daes of MC and 3 literally consecutive visits to the doc's and 3 diff. dosages of medication and a prayer had healed me from that. (thank the Lord.)


wells. lost 2.5 kg.(and hopefully not gain it back..) lol.


cat's been nice to mi...cos she didn't bite mi yesterdae (maybe cos i was too sick to irritate her so she also never bite mi la..) ..and she faked her bites when i irritated her just now... =)


maybe it's time for mi to rest la...getting quite tired le...till then...tata!


well wells. gillian's down with high fever and is having a bad headache.


and oh wells...she thinks that she needs some rest cos her temperature reading's 38.5 deg C.


anyway. she has 2 daes MC. and she's happie and worried abt tt cos she's gotta miss loads of lessons.


oh wells..gotta give her an ice pack..if not the teperature's never gg to subside!..


tt's all for now..bb! ---GiLLiE---


hmm.updates.


i realised that i have a phobia of getting into a relationship with ppl. just dawned on mi one dae when i was brushing my teeth. now dun ask mi why when im brushing my teeth cos i dunno. like i said in one of my 300-odd posts...i think i said that i fear of getting hurt again by ppl( somewhere similar in context, in any case.). i've been hurt and i feel that i walled up a part of mi to ppl. i bet no one actually noes that cos they dun read this blog and even they do, i guess, they forget too..obviously with exceptions. wadevas.


toked to ppl whom i haven't seen/ contacted for ages. yay. this proves that u have to make the first move. =p. toking rubbish now.


oh. my cat is a terrorist.ya.she attacked mi for no particular reason today. oh! i forgot to feed the cat just now. oops...sorry catz...ya..anyway...i hope she won't attack mi cos i forgot to feed her just now.


oh did i mention? my korean drama serials are gg to end le...now left the 'bride at 18' only..yay...thank God that 'stained glass' ended just before sch reopens... =)


gotta chao...cos im tired le...bb!


eh.sick la. so sian.


i love min zhenghao la...so cute lors...i noe it's so random and sounds dumb too...but it always happens whenever i haven't watched tt show for a very long time...


anyways...daryl agreed to help me tune my guitar!!!yay!!! cos i also dun reallie noe how to tune it even with the help of kenny's tuner..i noe...im a dummy when it comes to that...which reminds mi tt i haven't touched my guitar for super duper long period of time le... =p


and he also said tt he'll give mi speakers too..lol...cos he keep saying tt i should get speakers cos he (and alot of other ppl too) last time wan send songs or animated websites with sounds to mi but always rejected him cos i dun have speakers and always say i got no money..which is true...


yep.anyways...decided to attend the evening service there..even tho i really have to study...cos i dunno really noe why. anyways,they were super shocked to see mi there and of course i knew some more ppl there..and sarah and bryan [<----cute guy hu pons church, i heard. =p] (im not sure if their names are spelt liaddat...but it's the most common way of spelling their names..) were very sweet to mi...cos i i didn't bring a jacket/shawl and i had cold limbs..so she loaned mi hers till next week..but i still passed it to kenny to pass it to her..and bryan had to repeat the bus routes a zillion times to mi just becos i didn't noe how to reach a mrt station and i had to mit my mom..haha...felt so bad la...


arghz.sch tml la...and i so dun wan go sch...zzz....(random.my cat's sleeping in a giordano pastic bag with her head sticking out...so cute!!!!) wadevas...yep.


back from batam.


felt that this camp's quite good, cos i felt more spiritualliy refreshed and challenged. but then again, it brings about questions like which way is exactly the ways that God, in His holy word, said in how we should worship Him.


i have never felt so strongly before, like wad they said, the Holy Spirit's moving thru mi. even tho i had, before that had answered the altar call by 'accident'.even praising Him in songs, my hands just shaked uncontrollbly, until when i focused on sth other than praising Him. (i did that cos it's reallie painful and my muscles hurt a fair bit.)


knew (some more in-depth) of the tertiary ppl..cos my sis' in tertiary ministry...ppl like fish, jenifer (x2...i dun noe their sirnames!), sher ping, xiao ting, yun wei, xue fang, eddie, kenny, yuan mun, adrian, joanne heng, annie, jeremy heng and others that i cant reallie rmb at the moment...and some of the youths like victoria, joanne, bethesia, qiao fen, waine,...


oh ya!!!!there's this guy in my sis church that look like DARYL!!!!!lol...not exactly features- wise...but the way they smile la..lol...like i nearly got a 'shock' when i realised that.like woah.they looked so like, especially the side view.


oh ya...brigitte, do u still remember tt time i said i saw a girl at far east tt looked like jeremy?i've found ler liaos..hahas..wad a small world la...she's actually my sis' good friend lors...


yawns.so tired.zzzz..gg slp liao la...bb!


i noe that i haven't post for a very long time!!


some updates.


still feeling far away from God. gg for my sis' church camp in batam tml. khairul had his op to place tt titanium plate in his skull todae. most at church camp in jb.


so gonna miss my cat!!!!and my tv (all the korean dramas tt i've been watching..), my com (internet), my bed, my cactuses...and maybe all my friends too.


something more comforting....batam can receive channel u!!! but im not too sure if im free to watch too. not too comforting huh? =p


oh ya...if u cannot find my tagboard...it's right underneath all my links..do rmb to tag ya? =)


tata! pon lessons todae..cos it's kinda boring in sch.


so much to sae but just like having a blank mind when about to type..cos i dunno wad to start off to...


first of all..i think tt my life (both spiritual and physical..)is in a horrid mess...that's the thought of the month.and i dun realllie feel like elaborating, just that there are bad thoughts running thru my head..like just giving up everything that i have ba..


and i feel quite crap. dunno why i placed this skin here for... -princess of His Highest dun feel like one. -


and gillie is so frustrated with gillian.


dun try to matchmake gillian with any tom dick or harry. cos she's MINE.grrr. and i will bite. *munches a cookie*


burdened. with no one past caring. even they do, i dun wish to burden them.wish my cat was a human.


sch blues.


i dun wan sch la...idiotic...cos i can't go retreat.bleahs.


and also about mr smilely face. been complaining until i think that everyone's sick of that..i rather not have any letters la...eeek.


and if u, job ang, happen to read this..u noe wad u owe mi...heh..i wanna hear la!!!!


oh wells. i still haven't watch x-men III. argh! and i still haven't done my dnt/ hw or tune my guitar or practice/ learn anything on the guitar too...and be stuck at home the next week when most are off to church camp.


many random thoughts running amok in my head now...


dun even noe where to start from. from the thoughts that i have from the things that i have see and heard recently to matters of the heart (which i will not elaborate in this post..).


i dunno wad's wrong with mi...but i feel kinda dejected..and a bit helpless and felt that im nothing la..


i find that hummans are just weird. they claim that they want human rights, freedom, justice, equality and wad-have-u-not for themselves. if they reallie want all those, then why do saddistic things to animals or even plants(which is rare..but ya..)? aren't those lives? u claim that lives are important and precious, isn't it? don't they have lives? don't animals and plants have parents? then where u think they came from? from stones or they fell from the sky? even though they do not have human intellengence, but didn't studies show that they actuallie have a higher I.Q than us? even though some of them may be scavangers, but dun they show more love and care to their young than some of the human parents? at the very least, in the animal kingdom, there's no such things as abuse or abortion. why can't we learn to be more like them, be simple ppl and knowing when to show our gratitude to others and to be content with wad u have??


we say that we are a superior spieces, but are we really that superior over them? in terms of size or strength, we are definitely no match fot most of them, but we are only superior in terms of how to make things to our advantage and the so-called 'emotions'. by having these, does that mean that any life on earth is a superior spieces? if animals have them, won't we be called inferior spieces because we can't even do anything to fend for ourselves.


mind in a whirl now.


after disappearing for a long time, mr smiley face appeared!!!and he told mi in the letter that he had 'confidence in mi' to guess who he was...


im so clueless to how he noe so much la....and i think i might be guessing the right person...but i dun even noe anything abt him la...


anyway...i dunno la!!!!so complicated...hu noes...it might just be some i dunno hu in the sch la...